Category: Yogi

“Every muscle in my
body feels like it’s
been in the back of

a dump truck, driving
down an alley in the
Chicago Federal District.

I have gone to yoga like
9 days in a row – six of
which Kevin kept the room
at over 110 and 60% humidity.
He says things in his class
like “My wife thinks I

hold the postures too long.”
As I’m sitting in balancing
stick for a full minute.

Am I going to feel better TJ?
I can barely walk.”

She just giggles her

fairy from another world
giggle.

“I don’t think so. You
know the drill.”

I turn on my laptop
in search of a
groupon massage.

TJ pours

the tea.

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Extension

“There is nothing
right now
that I can say

to you. Or suggest.
Or anything but –

I want you to know
that I am here
with you. I am here

with you and
present and you
are not alone,

even if it
feels like
it. So I’m going to
just shut the

fuck up and sit
right here next to
you. I smile at her.

She looks like a very
scared and small vibrating
but innocent puppy.

“Do you want to
hold my
hand?” I put my left
hand out towards her.

She stares at it,
looks into my eyes.

Takes my hand. Manages
a smile.

We sat there for a
long time yesterday.

I left work
went to my therapist
and cried but

today I got up
and went back and
that scared woman

turned human and
alive again. We did
yoga for hours.

She ate. She shook less
and I didn’t
cry when I left.

I went to yoga and
flew into a rage but
in the meditation I

found the raging little
girl I was once
inside of me and I
said to her that I am

going to just
try to just
sit here with you

and be your witness.
I’m going to stop
having a fucking cow
that

idiots get up and
leave a hot room in the
middle of the sequence

and just sit
with the real
anger that comes
from the core of

my being.

Not sure yet
if it helped.

But I
tried and
my client

taught me
how.